Beauty and the Feast - Remix
by Zhe01
Summary: Blaire's upcoming wedding and news of pregnancy drive Chuck Bass over the brink and the results from that are baffling. The extent of madness eventually stops giving any signs of the method he claims. LGBT friendly theme.


**Disclaimer**: I do not own nor influence or resale Gossip Girl, it's merchandise or pimp its actors and actresses. The characterizations below are based on a fictional world and the names are coincidental…

Spin off – Gossip Girl – Season 5 – Episode 2 – Beauty and the Feast

A Dan/Chuck story

_Original Cut 00:32:30 (Words in __**bold**__ couldn't be deciphered.)_

_Dan Humphry walks into the alley where he finds Chuck Bass being beat up by two thugs that he has apparently hired for the job._

"_Hey! Whoa! Again? Guys, come on! Y-you can't-…"_

_One of the thugs reaches and smacks Dan on his mouth, causing him to bleed and stumble backwards._

"_Hey! I'm not part of this payment plan!"_

"_Sorry," the thug responds and turns back to Chuck. "Mr. Bass said nothing's to stop us except the safe word."_

"_This is serious. He could die."_

"_There'll always be madness but there is some method in it," Chuck replies, looking up at Dan before receiving a kick to his side. "Guess that wasn't the safe word."_

"_Chuck! Chuck. Tell them to stop."_

_A moment's pause brought Chuck to a concession. "Ok… Fine. Stop," he said before he settled on the floor for a second as the thugs walked away._

"_Let's go," one of them said as they left._

_As soon as they left Dan looked at Chuck. "Stop? Really? That's it?"_

"_I'm not trying to kill myself."_

"_Then what the hell are you doing?"_

_Chuck strained to stand, not meeting Dan's eyes. "I was hoping it would hurt."_

"_Was it to dull the pain of losing Blaire?" Dan said, disbelievingly._

"_That's what you don't understand," Chuck began to explain then finally looked up at Dan directly. "I feel nothing when I see her or Louis… or when I jump off a building, or when I crash a motorcycle, even… you_

_... don't irritate me."_

"_Well having these guys beat you up is not the way to try to feel something." Chuck looked away. "You could have died."_

_Chuck turned back to him and said, "Is being dead that much worse than being nothing?" With that, Chuck dropped his gaze, as did Dan._

Spin off begins:

Dan stopped Chuck from walking away as soon as he turned and started to. "Chuck, stop."

Silently, Chuck stopped and looked at Dan over his shoulder.

Dan took a step towards him, holding Chuck's right wrist with his left hand and cradling his face with his right. They both froze, equally unsure of what is happening. Dan moved closer until he was barely a couple of inches away from Chuck's face. "Stop hurting yourself."

At that point, Chuck's heart felt like it was trying to pump too much blood around his body legs to make them heavy and not enough keep his upper body warm… or his keep head from floating away. His head began to dissociate and go light. Dan gasped as he caught him. "Fuck," he hissed, looking around for anyone at all. Giving up, he gathered enough leverage to lift Chuck slightly off the ground so he can walk out of the alley. Chuck regained consciousness but couldn't hold himself up. He waved a cab and got them both in awkwardly before saying the address.

"Hospital."

Dan watched chuck for signs of a concussion. By the time the cab started moving, Chuck's eyes were open in little slits.

"Chuck, you'll be fine. We're taking you to the nearest ER."

"You can take me home instead. I don't need a hospital I'll make one come to me."

"What?"

"Stop the cab, I'm getting out."

The driver slowed down, unsure. "No."

"Look, I'm not going to any hospital. I'll just make the call."

Dan looked him in the eye. He pulled out his phone and held it out to Chuck.

Chuck shook his head once silently and pulled his own phone from his pocket.

"Hello Dr. House, Chuck Bass. How fast can you get to the Palace?"

"My place."

Chuck looked sideways at Dan. "You're asking for too much."

"That or ER, you chose."

"Fine, what's the address?"

Eventually, Chuck hung up and slipped the phone back in his pocket.

"You can't go to the Palace and be alone there. Nate is flying in within a few hours and I won't go to the place where you have power to kick me out by snapping your fingers."

Chuck chuckled silently.

Chuck settled back in the seat. "Thank you."

A few seconds later, Dan said, "but if I believe you're in danger, I'm calling 911, regardless of your silly doctor boy."

Chuck resigned and stared out the window.

Some minutes later, Dan pushed the door to the loft open and let Chuck in. "Welcome to your getaway. I'm holding you hostage until I'm convinced that you will stop the nonsense."

"Kidnaping and holding against my will? Very brave, Humphry. I didn't know you had it in you."

"You have no idea what I have in me, Bass." Dan just closed the door and pointed his hand to his room.

"Your place is so sad."

"Your face is so sad," Dan retorted and let Chuck into the room. "In 20 minutes you start tickle therapy."

Chuck raised an eyebrow at him.

"Sorry, I'm used to nursing ladies." Dan kept a straight face for a while then exhaled. "Damn, there's no pulling a smile out of you." Dan walked out of the room saying, "get comfortable, I'll make tea."

Chuck sat down on the bed, numb. He chuckled to himself, running his hand on the bed sheet. "I can't even feel the texture." He loosened his tie and shirt then unbuttoned his pants before he kicked his shoes off and lied down.

_Original Cut 00:39:35 (Words in __**bold**__ couldn't be deciphered.)_

_Dan answered the door of the loft to find Blaire on the other side._

"_If I don't know you better I'd think you're starting to like Brooklyn."_

"_It isn't Brooklyn I'm here for," Blaire nonchalantly said. She sighed as she made herself comfortable on the couch. "You're the only person I can have furtive, emotionally loaded conversations with right now." A pause later, she looked at him directly, "how's Chuck?"_

"_Uh… he's ok. Sort of. Long, __**frodient**__ story. How're you?"_

"_Pregnant."_

_Dan paused, looking at her while holding the kettle._

Spin off continues:

"Yup. Pregnant," she confirmed. It took Dan some more seconds to start moving again. "I figured you're the only unbiased source I have contact with that I can trust."

"Well, what are you planning to do about it?" he asked, pouring some tea into a mug.

"I'm having this baby."

Dan stopped pouring and put the kettle down. He exhaled and picked up the mug. "Excuse me Blaire, I'll be right back."

"I'm sorry, do you have company?"

"I'll be right back," Dan said hurrying into his room and closing the door, leaving Blaire outside on the couch.

He faintly heard her cry to him, "I'll be back later, Dan! I'm going for coffee with S – she's finally not too busy for her best friend!"

Dan walked into the room and looked up at the man in the bed. He went closer and put the mug on the pad that rested on the table next to the bed. He sat down and reached, touching his temple and softening his expression as the eyes slowly opened.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey," a hoarse reply came.

"I made some chamomile and honey tea for you. You should drink it. It's a great natural anti-inflammatory remedy."

The man chuckled.

"Can I tickle you now?"

"No. Creep."

Dan smiled a little, helping him up and handing him the mug.

Chuck took the mug and savored the worriless comfort he was feeling as he realized that was all his mind could really think of at that moment. "Now I know why everyone likes you."

"Yup. It's because of my awesome tea-making abilities."

A chuckle came.

Dan half smiled. "There it is."

Chuck sipped at the tea.

"I like it when you listen. It makes things so much easier when dealing with a Bass."

Chuck snorted.

Firm knocks came from the front door.

Dan stood. "I'll handle it."

"Dan-…" Chuck said as Dan turned. Dan paused and looked at him. "No one must know I'm here."

"I understand." Dan started leaving but then turned with an incredulous look. "Did you just call me Dan?" Chuck looked at him, bored, with a raised eyebrow and pursed lips – the ultimate 'I'm not impressed' Chuck Bass look. With that, Dan left the room with a chuckle and closed the door behind him. Chuck watched him leave before sipping on the tea again.

"Hey!" Dan greeted as he came back to Nathaniel Archibald and no Blaire Waldorf. "How was the trip?"

"Great. Everything should be set for the benefit that It should be interesting publicity for my dad and hopefully a crap load of welcome backs rather than shuns."

Dan motioned for Nate to sit. "Drink?"

"No, I'm good," Nate replied, sitting down.

"So, tell me more about your trip."

"Cut the crap, Dan. I know Chuck is here."

Dan sobered up and looked directly at Nate. He pursed his lips in realization that the upper east side elites have all the connections they need to even know which underwear someone they're watching is wearing. "How did you know?"

Nate pulled out his phone and waved the latest Gossip Girl broadcast that had a picture of him and Chuck walking into his building with a title under it that says, 'Bass spotted with a frenemy, in Brooklyn, and with a black eye!' He sighed, not bothering to look further.

"So, according to this, he should still be here since it's fresh."

"I can't let you see him, Nate."

"Why not?"

"He asked to be left alone."

"Is he in your room?" Nate said, nodding towards the closed door through the shelf. When Dan didn't respond, Nate got up and started walking to it.

"Nate," Dan said, grabbing his arm. Nate lifted an eyebrow in question and surprise. "I can't let you see him right now," Dan said, his eyes narrowed and jaws clenched.

"He's been so reckless lately. I just want him to explain the fucking black eye TODAY."

"It's Chuck. You don't need any more explanation. Besides, there's probably none."

Nate freed himself, his expression changing from irritation to anger. "You know, don't you?" he said completely turning to face Dan again. A few seconds of silence later, he turned and went to the door again.

"Hey!" Dan cried, completely swinging him around from his elbow. "This is my place and I control who goes where and when."

"Humphry. Don't stand in my way."

"Leave."

"Dan."

"Leave," Dan said, his tone down a notch.

"Chuck?!" Nate called over Dan's shoulder.

"Nate."

"Chuck! Come the fuck out!"

"LEAVE!" Dan said shoving Nate away from the door.

Nate, in disbelief tottered backwards. "What the hell, Dan?"

"Shit… I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me," Dan apologized just as the door opened.

"What, Nathaniel?" Chuck nonchalantly said putting a hand on Dan and silently telling him to let him through.

"What happened to your face?!"

Chuck didn't respond.

"What do you want Nate?"

"Dude, I wanted to know if you're ok. Gossip Girl has a terrible picture of you walking in here with Dan. Your phone is off."

"Look, I'm fine."

"Your face says otherwise."

"I'll BE fine," Chuck corrected before turning to Dan. "Sorry for the imposition, I'll go. Good night, Humphrey."

"Hey!" Dan retorted as Chuck started walking to the door. "Chuck, stop!"

Nate exhaled and turned to see Chuck and Dan at the front door.

"Just go back and rest. Nate and I will be the only ones who know you're here. You don't have to leave."

"Everyone knows." Chuck shook his head. "I'm leaving. I have my own place."

With that, Chuck walked out of the apartment. Dan turned to Nate with an unhappy expression.

"This is crazy. He should be committed. It's insane."

"I know. He's not a child, though. We cannot force him to get help."

"I mean… he can basically fly in any psychiatrist or therapist in the world if he wants to. I hate the fact that he's given up and turned to this method."

The right corner of Dan's lips frowned. "There's nothing we can do but be there for him as friends."

"I'm kind of glad he doesn't hate your guts anymore for no reason."

"Me too, can't complain."

Nate stood. "He'll be fine. We all got him. Like you said… we're his friends and eternal safety net," he said, picking up his jacket from the couch and throwing it on.

"I didn't exactly say-."

"-Shut up."

Dan smiled at saw Nate to the door.

_Original Cut 00:40:14_

_Chuck is in bed, fighting to keep his heart in his chest. His dog comes onto the bed with him just before his eye let go of a tear. Chuck cuddles the dog._

Spin off:

"Thank you, Dan," Chuck said, exhaling and closing his eyes for the night.

Nate walked into the apartment and peeked into Chuck's room. He softly closed the door and walked to the kitchenette. He poured himself some Scotch and sat on the stool. He took a gulp and looked towards Chuck's room. "Holy shit. Blaire broke Chuck." He couldn't actually laugh about his own sarcastic thought.

A beep jolted the occupants of the apartment. Nate looked at the message and his eyes widened in disbelief. He jumped at the sound of a phone hitting a wall and shattering. He got up and went towards Chuck's room.

"Chuck?" he said approaching the door and opening it. He ran in and kneeled in front of Chuck, sitting up on the bed, heaving attempts to breath and already breaking a sweat. "Chuck? Chuck…" He started to chant for Chuck's attention. "Chuck!" he said shaking him.

"I can't breath."

Nate pulled out his mobile phone and started dialing 911. "Hello, 911, this is Nathaniel Archibald…" He continued to tell the operator the address and situation. The operator started to ask Nate to manipulate Chuck around to make breathing easier. Nate stayed on the line while trying to calm Chuck as much as possible.

"Nate…Nate…"

"I'm here."

"I think this is it. I think I'm dying."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

"I hear it Nate. I feel it. This is it."

"FUCKING SHUT UP CHUCK!"

Chuck's form began to tremble uncontrollably. He grunted and curled to his side.

"I'm here. Chuck, don't you fucking dare die…" Nate began to incessantly ramble on while sitting next to Chuck with a hand on his elbow.

The dog that had stayed across the room throughout Nate's call settled and lied down watching and whimpering. Less than a couple of minutes later, the sirens approached the Palace and eventually the elevator door opened and police medics and an officer entered the space.

"Step back, please."

Nate got up and took a few steps back. The dog immediately went to him and settled next to his foot. With intent eyes, he watched the team bring Chuck back to breathing normally and eventually settle. "Is he ok?" he found himself asking.

"He went through an anxiety attack, that's all," the police medic said, standing. "Is this the first time for this to happen?" she asked as her two colleagues helped Chuck's arm out of the shirt and resettled him.

"Yes officer, at least from what I know."

She looked at the other medic injecting a relaxant into Chuck's arm. He was breathing well, and the sweat was turning cold. Chuck's eyes closed as he sighed. "Monkey…"

The team looked at him questioningly while Nate patted the dog and nodded towards Chuck. The dog got up and jumped up the bed to cuddle with its master who in return petted him slowly. Chuck was zoned completely out of what just happened and continued to pet and cuddle the dog.

"Monkey… You won't leave me, right?"

Monkey simply blinked slowly and stayed still. Less than a minute later, Nate was back in the room.

"Damn, Chuck. You scared the piss out of me," he said.

Chuck chuckled. "We should tell Dan I got close again. I told him I always make just edge it." He snorted.

"Seriously, Chuck. Are you feeling better, now?"

Chuck looked up at him. "I'm fine."

Nate nodded.

"No one must know about this."

Silently, Nate gazed his disapproval.

"No one… must… know," Chuck slowly and purposely said.

Nate exhaled. "The medics said that you should follow up with a psychiatric evaluation."

Chuck raised an eyebrow.

"Come on, Chuck," Nate prodded.

"Fuck off, Nate," Chuck whispered.

Nate opened his mouth to respond but he noticed that Chuck had closed his eyes and was ready to pass out. The corners of his mouth frowned but he left the room, leaving the door open a quarter of the way.

Chuck Bass opened his eyes to the sun shining through the apartment and lighting up his room dimly through the stained glass. He noticed that he had half of the duvet sandwiching him and holding him hostage to comfort.

"Monkey?" he called out. A few seconds later, Monkey trotted into the room and Nate followed in. "Looks like you have a buddy," Chuck added, nodding towards Nate to Monkey.

"Let's go out for breakfast. Get some fresh air."

"What do you have in mind?"

"Anywhere but here."

Chuck looked to his side when he heard his phone vibrate on the table next to him. He looked at the message then put it back down.

"Just ignore business for today. Let's go, get up."

Even though the decision troubled him greatly, Nate decided to keep Chuck's episode a secret. He spent the morning watching Chuck down drink after drink… after drink… after drink… after drink-

"That's enough Chuck. We should go," Nate said, waving at the waitress for the check.

"Whatever."

On the Brooklyn side of the city, Dan, Rufus and Serena were enjoying a cozier breakfast prepared by Dan, himself.

"Anyone want more OJ?" Rufus said, getting up to the refrigerator.

"No thanks," Serena replied. "I'm stuffed. This was a great breakfast, Dan. I advise you to always start the next day with those waffles if you want them to come back."

"Excuse me?" Rufus said.

"Nothing…"

Smiles later, Dan finally spoke up. "The main reason I asked you two here is that I need advice on how I should handle a problem."

Rufus closed the refrigerator's door and turned to him. "What's wrong?"

"Well nothing's wrong with me… but I have this friend who seems to be troubled. He resorts to violence, self abuse and maybe even self-mutilation but I don't know that and I can't prove it. Should I tell his family or leave him to it."

"Who is it?" Serena asked.

"I can't tell you."

Rufus looked directly into Dan's eyes. "Is it someone we know?"

"Possibly… maybe… yes."

"Dan, who is it?" Serena prodded.

"Look, I can't tell you!"

Rufus' phone rang and stopped the argument. He was surprised to identify the caller. "Nate, hello, what's up? …Ok, but why? …Ok. When and where? … Yes, you are most welcome to come… I will see you then… Bye." Rufus hung up and turned to Dan and Serena.

"Is Nate ok?" Serena asked.

"I don't know, he said that he wanted to see me."

"Did he tell you why?" Dan added.

"No."

"Is Chuck ok?"

They both turned to Dan.

"I'm sure he is?" Rufus said, baffled.

"Oh, ok," Dan said, retreating and kicking himself for the question.

"Dan, is Nate the one you were talking about?" Serena asked.

"What? No. No…"

"Well you said 'he', and that means it has to be someone within our circle since we 'possibly', 'maybe', and even 'yes' know him. Its just you, Nate, Chuck and… Oh my God… Are you talking about Eric? Is Eric ok?" Serena said, starting to panic at the realization.

"No! Eric isn't the one I'm talking about."

Moment of silence later, Rufus spoke, "you already have your foot in the mud, Dan. Just talk."

Nate hung up from his call and exhaled, hoping he wasn't making a mistake by talking to Rufus about sorting out ways to help end Chuck's self-destruction pattern of dealing. In his drunken stupor, Chuck had fallen asleep on the couch in front of him as soon as they arrived.

"You probably shouldn't have had so much alcohol so early after what they shot you with yesterday, idiot," he said to the sleeping Chuck.

Chuck chuckled in his sleep and mumbled, "'m Chuck Bss."

Nate rolled his eyes at that. "Even while you're asleep? Jesus."

Nate checked his watch then got up and left.

Back on the Brooklyn side of things, Dan started working when Serena and Rufus left. The next thing he knew, it was getting dark out. "Holy shit," he said looking at his watch. "No wonder my back hurts." He got up and stretched. He thought a second then thought it a good idea to go to the Palace boys to check on Chuck. He doesn't know why he cared… but he did. He grabbed his coat and went.

Throughout the cab ride, Dan kept telling himself that he was checking on a friend, even if that friend doesn't acknowledge the friendship nor want it. He wasn't convinced, but he cared enough to go anyway. Walking into the lobby of Palace is usually a dazzle. Walking into the lobby of Hotel Empire with Nate sitting alone on a couch drinking out of a big bottle of alcohol is surprising. He went to sit next to him.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"Did you get to see Rufus?"

"How did you know?"

"We were having breakfast together. Serena was there too."

"Oh," Nate sighed.

"What's up?"

"Nothing," Nate grumbled, gulping down another shot.

"Chuck is rubbing off on you, I see."

"No. I just wanted to be close after yest-uh…no."

"Wait, what happened yesterday?"

"Most of what was 'yesterday' happened then."

Dan gave him a 'come on' kind of look.

"Let's just say, Chuck is not over Blaire."

"Well, that's news."

Nate looked directly at him. "No one must know what I'm about to tell you. Only Rufus and you would know outside of Chuck and I."

"I promise. What's up?"

Nate took a second to breath and to collect himself. "I had to call 911 on Chuck last night."

Dan's jaw dropped. "What?

Nate sighed again. "After that text from Gossip Girl about Blaire's pregnancy, he apparently couldn't handle it. Anxiety attack."

"You called 911 for anxiety?"

"Dan," Nate said, sensing the incredulousness in Dan's demeanor.

"He couldn't breath. He was shaking. It was awful, man."

"Oh."

"He kept saying that he is going to die and God knows how hard I had to hold off punching him for even thinking that."

"What did dad say?"

"He said that it's best to have the call for help come from him because only he can accept the help. He advised against talking to Lily about it because of how much stress she has on her with everything that's going on with them. It was helpful talking to him. He has this calming effect and a way of dealing… creatively with things." Nate paused as Dan nodded in agreement. "The main course of action is to simply let Chuck ride it out until he balances or falls off. He did, though, recommend keeping you involved since you're a sincere friend who has no motive to harm Chuck… anymore."

Dan halfheartedly smiled. "I wish there was something that we can do."

"I know. I just wanted another adult in his family to know what's going on."

"Ouch?"

"Besides you, I mean."

"Mmhm." Dan turned to face forward. "Is he upstairs?"

"I don't know. I stayed here after I came back and didn't go up yet."

Dan licked his lips. "Shouldn't we check on him?"

"Probably. He's probably got a party going, though so expect anything." Nate stumbled before walking towards the elevators with Dan. "Am I pretty?" he sang as the doors closed.

Dan looked at Nate, horrified.

Nate shook with laughter.

They walked into the apartment to silence, darkness and not a hint of life.

"Chuck?" Nate called.

"What?" a voice responded from the separator between the sitting area and the kitchen. Nate flipped on the lights as they walked around and saw Chuck just sitting there on the floor and looking out.

"Chuck?"

"I said 'what'."

"Are you ok?" Dan said.

"I'm fine."

"That's seems to be the answer every time."

"Then stop asking."

"Why were you sitting in the dark?" Nate said, turning the lights on.

"The streetlights are nice to look at."

"Are you drunk again?" Nate said, lifting an eyebrow.

"No."

"Are you high?" Dan asked.

Chuck gave them a dirty look. "No. Leave me alone."

"Where's Monkey?" Nate asked, looking around.

"Dog walker."

"Did you eat?" Dan asked.

"What is this, twenty questions?" Chuck loudly responded.

"We care," Dan said in a demanding voice.

"Well, stop it," Chuck said, turning serene once more and turning to the ceiling-to-floor window.

A few seconds later, Dan put a hand on Nate's shoulder. "Why don't you get him something to eat from down?"

"I'm not hungry!" Chuck yelled. "Leave. Me. The fuck. Alone."

"Look, Chuck, we're your friends, ok?" Dan tried to reason.

"My friends? You're not my friend, Dan Humphrey."

Dan felt a stab at his chest and even Chuck could see the hurt, but he didn't budge. He took a deep breath and continued, "we are your friends whether you know and acknowledge it or not. We love you and care about you."

Chuck chuckled.

"Chuck, stop being an asshole," Nate said.

"It's ok," Dan said.

"I'll stop being an asshole if you all stop lying."

"What?" Nate replied, stunned, as was Dan. Dan recovered quickly and put a hand on Nate's arm before stepping closer and kneeling down so that he was just above eyelevel with Chuck.

"Chuck, you actually think that we don't love and care about you?" Dan quietly asked.

Chuck looked off to the side of the partition that was empty. "Why should you?"

Nate sat down next to Chuck and Dan sat from his kneeling position.

"This is not a pajama party," Chuck grumbled, looking back towards them.

"Do you know what your problem is, Chuck? We all throw our love at you and you just put it in a box to maybe acknowledge later. Sometimes you even forget about it and let it collect dust! That's why you don't feel anything. You boxed off everything," Nate quietly spoke.

"Don't you get it?" Chuck said, his voice dropping. "I am meant to be one. I destroy and burn to be so. To be one is to be only. I am one."

"You're ONE of us, Chuck. We are all your family," Dan said.

"I have no family."

"You know what? This is turning into a self-pity party. You need to stop before you start believing your own words, man." Chuck turned to him and Nate's eyes momentarily widened at the foreign vulnerability in his eyes.

"It's not good to love me. I bring misery. I bring sacrifice. Just… leave me alone. I don't deserve-…" Chuck stopped himself midsentence and cleared his throat.

Nate and Dan thought that the air they were inhaling wasn't enough to take the heaviness that their friend was feeling.

"Chuck? Why would you think you don't deserve love?" Dan said first.

"That's not what I said!" Chuck firmly replied.

"Ok. You need to listen to what I have to say, Chuck," Dan said, looking Chuck in the eye. "Nate is right. You don't accept the things you want the most. As long as you reject love, you won't have it. As long as you don't acknowledge friends, then you are the one that you're talking about. Is this about Blaire?"

"Blaire was the only one who…" Chuck stopped talking and dropped his gaze.

"No – and that's where you are wrong. Blaire was not the only one. You have many who love value you, regardless of your harsh demeanor and cold exterior. We love the flesh and blood that is Chuck Bass. We love the friend who will always come through even if he trashes you to your face that is Chuck Bass. We love the strong man who can handle powerful corporation at a tender age gracefully that is Chuck Bass."

"No!" Chuck cried then gasped in shock. His eyes were wide and his mouth was very slightly gaped at the breakthrough.

"Face it, dude. We love you," Nate said nonchalantly, scooting closer and looking out the window.

Chuck remained silent, only breathing deeply and listening to his heartbeat throughout his body, to the point where he could see his pulse in his vision.

"Chuck?" Dan almost whispered in a low tone, grabbing Nate's attention. Chuck stared through the window in front of him, but not seeing the world – just himself sitting there, vulnerable and lost for words between the reflection of two people who he doesn't even know whether he should trust or not. He believes the untrusting and untrustworthy one is the one they are trying to poke at. The monster. Dan put a hand on his shoulder and shifted to a kneeling position on his knees so he can look Chuck in the eye and bring him back to real time. Chuck turned to him. "You are a very valuable family member and friend. I will tell you that until you learn to believe it."

As if in a trance, Chuck lifted his hand and traced it up Dan's collarbone to his neck, nape then the back of his head. Dan was too bewildered to respond and Nate's lips parted at what was going on. A few seconds later, Dan pushed himself away and lost balance, falling on his side right onto his elbow and grunted in pain.

"What the FUCK, Chuck?" Dan cried out.

Chuck chuckled. "That rhymed."

"He lost it," Nate said. Dan hissed as he tried to get up and Nate sobered up to the realization that Dan was actually hurt. "Hey, you alright?"

"I'm fine," Chuck and Dan both said in sync. Dan sat up and flexed his arm around.

"Um, just to clear things up in my head. Were you just trying to kiss me?" Dan said, cocking his head to the side.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me," Chuck said staring at the reflection in front of him again.

"Ok."

Silence.

"Chuck?"

"What, Lonely boy?"

"Are you gay?"

"I don't think you're that stupid so I'll let you answer that."

"Bisexual? Bi-Curious? Uh…"

"Shut up, Humphrey."

"Ok, just checking. Remember you asked me before?"

"That's because you are."

Dan raises an eyebrow, projecting a bored look. Chuck almost laughed.

Silence.

"You're both gay," Nate said, getting up. With that, all three burst into laughter. "Let's get something to eat before they start closing up."

Dan started getting up when Chuck held his wrist. He paused.

"Thank you," Chuck whispered. Dan got sucked into the vulnerable and lost depths that were Chuck's eyes.

"Yeah, man. Sure," Dan said, slowly standing, and following Nate with Chuck a step behind.

Down the elevator, Nate kept looking at Dan and Chuck being awkward. He knew that it was probably the first time that they go out without any spiteful small talk. He also felt awkward with the silence on the ride down. He was convinced that Chuck was actually embarrassed to say anything because of his previous vulnerability. Nate nodded as he decided that Chuck would restore his so-called 'image' in no time.

"Dude? You're having an internal monologue again," Dan said, noticing Nate's expression and behavior as the elevator came to a stop.

"Well I have to talk to SOMEONE sane."

It was a short few seconds walk to the pizzeria nearby that normally neither Nate nor Chuck even entered before. Dan had to practically push them in.

As they ate, Chuck randomly held up a slice of pizza. "Do you know what goes best with pizza?"

Nate and Nate looked at him, waiting for the trademark ending.

"Lots and lots… of beer."

They deadpanned at him.

"What? It does."

"The great Chuck Bass drinks plebian beer?" Dan said in awe.

"Of course I do, let's get a round of beer here waitress!"

"No!" Nate cried out, motioning for her not to bring any. "You're not allowed to drink tonight." Chuck looked at Nate who shook his head and went back to eating pizza.

Dan could see the tension and the frustration building up in Chuck. "Just enjoy the pizza in front of you," he said, avoiding Chuck's glare but knowing it was better pointed at him than a good friend like Nate. Chuck's jaws kept clenching and unclenching for a few seconds with pursed lips then he lifted his brows and exhaled in defeat.

"Whatever." A few seconds later, he added, "this is stuff is gross."

Nate snorted a laugh.

After dinner, they walked back to the Palace and paused at the entrance.

"So, um, I'll see you guys," Dan said before leaving.

The half-smirk dropped from Chuck's face. He just nodded.

"See you, man," Nate said, slapping his shoulder as they turned and walked into the building. When Dan hissed, they turned back at him.

"Dan?" Nate said, wondering what's wrong.

"Nothing. I'm sorry. It's just the elbow I fell on before."

"Oh, sorry, man."

"Hey, no worries. I'll see you later."

"Later."

"Bye Chuck."

Chuck nodded again, his face void again.

As they went up the elevator to their apartment, Nate glanced at Chuck. "You could have just asked him to stay."

Chuck turned back to him. "Are you insane?"

"Well it's obvious you enjoyed his company."

"You're delusional," Chuck said walking into the apartment to be greeted by Monkey and his dog walker. He leaned down and greeted the dog as Nate smiled and walked the lady to the door. After bidding their goodnights, Chuck and Nate went to their respectable rooms. That night, Chuck could not sleep easily. He had no idea why, though. He figured that it was probably just extra energy from not doing much that day as he was not depressed, anxious nor sick. He pet Monkey thinking of nothing really while he stared at the ceiling until he eventually passed out for the night.

_In Chuck's dream:_

_He was lying back against someone who obviously knew a lot about pressure points on the head. He didn't bother at all as his hair was randomly ruffled and pet back down. It was so serene and dreamy yet surreal. "Feel," a whisper came in his ear, tickling his senses into waking up._

Some days have passed. At his loft, Dan was making coffee and preparing to write an essay for one of the magazines. His phone rang, attracting his attention. It was possibly the first time that name came up on his cellphone. He answered the call.

"Chuck Bass calling me? The apocalypse begins."

"Don't be silly."

There were some silent seconds on the phone before Dan spoke, "what can I do for you, Mr. Bass?"

"Nothing you can do without the power to move the Earth."

Dan almost silently chuckled.

"How's your elbow?"

"Fine, thanks for asking. I just slept it off and it managed to fix itself."

"You know things don't just fix themselves if you ignore them."

"My…things…do, apparently."

Chuck snorted. "Bye, Humphrey."

The call cut off before Dan could respond. He paused, recapping what had happened, and chuckled as he tossed the phone back on the counter next to his laptop. It had become a pattern for Dan and Nate to be there in the apartment when Chuck came home due to their crossing schedules and similar classes. Nate also watched Chuck transform… and one day, Chuck noticed it too.

"You wanted to talk?" Dan said, standing in front of Chuck on the sidewalk.

"Yes."

"What's up?"

Chuck paused, looking around before catching Dan's eyes again. "I think you and Nate should study in your loft from now on."

"Why? You can just tell us if you have something going on there. It's easier for us to meet at your place because of transportation on my part."

"I'm sure there are study rooms you can use at the campus."

Dan paused. "Which one of us is this really about? Me or Nate?"

Chuck pursed his lips and narrowed his eyes. "I don't want you in my apartment anymore."

"Ah. I'll talk to Nate about it."

"You will do no such thing."

Dan paused and waited for an explanation.

"You two are friends. Nate and I are friends. Don't ask, don't tell, no tension."

Dan swallowed. "No, really. What's going on, Chuck?"

"Humphrey, don't you get it? I don't want to see you anymore. I don't want you in my life at all. You don't even fit in my jigsaw."

"Just answer one question, Bass."

Chuck waited.

"Why don't you want to see me an-…"

"Because you make me feel!" Chuck bellowed and shut his mouth just as quickly when he realized the filters between his brain and mouth have failed him. He started to leave. Dan grabbed his arm, stopping him.

"Isn't that what you originally wanted? To 'feel'?!"

Chuck looked at him but remained quiet. He was not angry or vengeful to Dan's perception. He seemed more like lost and repressed.

"It terrifies you," he softly said, taking a step closer. "Doesn't it?"

"Fuck off, Humphrey."

Chuck yanked his hand away, turned his back and walked away. Dan watched him leave then pulled out his phone to text Nate. Almost instantly, he received Nate's reply, saying that the earliest he could see him was at dusk after his last class. Dan replied, telling him to come directly to Brooklyn tonight.

"What's up?" Nate said, walking in. "How come we're here today?"

"A change?"

"I'm not complaining or anything, it's fine.

They sat at the prepared space and Dan took a few seconds to collect his thoughts then spoke, "something happened earlier. I think it's important for you to know since it could change our study location."

"Hey, you want to that badly?

"Chuck Bass does."

"What? How is it his business?"

Dan lips frowned on one side. "He doesn't want to see me, apparently."

A few seconds of silence later, Nate adjusted the way he sat on the couch. "Chuck never told me that. Did he say why?"

"Something about jigsaw puzzles and me not being a piece in his game."

Nate closed his eyes. "I'll talk to him."

"No! This is a talk in confidence, Nate."

Nate frowned.

Dan shook his head.

"Ok. I won't tell him… but you're showing up to study in the apartment anyway."

Dan dropped his head.

"Hey, Chuck wants to feel. Let's piss him off. That's a 'feeling', isn't it?"

"Let's at least give him the rest of the week. Maybe he won't care?"

"Fine."

A couple of days later, Dan and Nate found themselves in the apartment at the Palace together.

"Are you sure this is ok?"

"Yeah, no worries, man. Chuck probably forgot all about it."

"O-k," Dan kind of sang back as they went to the elevator. Dan relaxed after realizing that Chuck wasn't there and probably won't be for a few hours. A couple of hours later, they started wrapping up their study session.

"Hang on," Dan said, checking his vibrating phone. He held up a finger and went behind the separating wall where the kitchen is.

The elevator door opened and in came Chuck.

"Hey," Nate greeted.

"Hey."

"Where've you been?"

"I contacted a shelter to come pick up the dog."

"What?" Nate gasped. "I thought you like him."

"I like nothing."

Dan came around the separator and paused when he noticed Chuck.

"I thought I told you never to show your face in my house again."

Dan grimaced. "The word 'didn't' implies past tense."

"GET. THE FUCK. OUT!" Chuck growled pointing towards the elevator.

"Look, Chuck we have an exam and we're just wrapping up," Nate said, trying to calm the situation.

"Then why don't you just go WITH him to wrap up elsewhere?" Chuck hissed.

"What the hell is your problem, Chuck? I'm sick of you acting like you're the almighty brat who can snap his fingers and make people disappear! You're being unreasonable and you know it!"

"Fine! I'll leave!" Chuck yelled back and turned to leave.

"Why do you hate me so much, dude? What did I do to you?" Dan finally said. Chuck clenched his jaws and turned to eye Dan across the room. "I'll gladly leave. Just tell me why you hate me so much."

A moment later, Chuck began to snarl, "I. Don't. Know."

"Chuck, are you ok?" Dan said, approaching with a look of concern, Nate following suit as soon as he saw the tear sliding down Chuck's left eye.

"Get away from me, peasant," Chuck said turning and going into his room.

Nate and Dan glanced at each other.

"Dude, did you see what I see?" Nate asked.

"Yeah. I just don't think he realized it."

Silence.

"I should go."

"No, stay. I'll go talk to him. I'll be right back."

Dan nodded.

The door opened and Nate walked in, closing the door behind him. The sight that greeted him was of Charles Bass sitting on the bed and just staring at the stained windowed wall that looked into the apartment with a very neutral expression.

"What happened out there?"

Chuck slowly turned his neck to look at him. "I don't know." He went back to his original position.

"You're only acting this way when Dan is concerned. So I know for sure not to call Dr. Ostroff." Nate stood in silence against the door. "You don't hate him, do you?"

Chuck remained silent.

"Chuck?"

Silence.

"Your fears came true didn't they?"

Silence.

"You like a boy."

"Shut up, Nate."

"It was bound to happen after all the ladies. Overdue, in my opinion."

"I said, 'shut up'."

"Alright I'm off your case… for now. Just make sure it's not rebound feelings of revenge or something."

Silence.

"Don't get into another mess if you're not sure."

"Do I look stupid?"

Nate gave him a look then pointed to his eye, "I'm not the one coming home with a black eye twice a week."

Just as Nate turned to leave, Chuck spoke, "Do you think…" Nate paused and turned to him. "Do you think Dr. Lynn can see me?"

A few seconds later, Nate nodded. "I'll ask for you if you want me to."

"I'd do it myself, but recommendations from insiders are more amiable."

"Than Bass threats?"

Chuck half smiled.

"You know… I hear Dan, like you, doesn't have a preference."

"Really?"

"No."

"Fucker."

Nate snorted a laugh. "You're really interested in him, aren't you?"

"No," Chuck slowly said, "I'm not gay, Nate."

"I didn't say you are."

Chuck sighed. "Bass needs an heir not a sissy boy."

"You're being too harsh, Chuck. Give your heart a break."

"It's wrong, Nate. It's not supposed to be part of my legacy."

"Shut up, Chuck," Nate said, in a soft tone. "It's not wrong. You've through a lot of the spectrum and you've kissed many guys before – you can't deny that. Specially not to ME." Nate took a breath. "Plus…you can't stop pushing him away that hard or you might lose even the possibility for good."

"Good."

Nate sighed and opened the door to leave. Before he took the final step out, he looked at Chuck. "You know? You're Chuck Bass. Nothing is wrong with you or whatever you do. When you want something, the rules cease to exist." A few seconds of silence later, Nate closed the door and returned to where he and Dan were studying.

Chuck remained where he was.

"That was intense," Dan said as Nate sat next to him on the couch.

"He doesn't hate you, Nate."

"I know. Who can hate this face?" Dan said looking at Nate. They chuckled after Nate caught his eye.

"Oh man. This is a mess."

"What? I cleaned up."

"I didn't mean the stationary and books."

"Oh." Dan paused for a couple of seconds then looked at Nate who was looking ahead instead. "What did you mean, then?"

Nate turned to him. "Dude, I need an honest answer ok?"

Dan raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"Do you have any gay in you?"

Dan face-palmed and turned to face ahead.

"Dude, I'm serious, come on."

"Is that why you asked me if I thought you were pretty before?"

"No, no." A pause later, he continued, "maybe?"

Dan turned to him, "I'm not gay, Nate,"

"Not even a little?"

Dan's other brow lifted too.

"Ok, ok! Let's just say I know someone who might be interested and it would do wonders if you approach first to end his stupid angst-based attitude about life and moving on from the past."

Dan's eyes both widened in realization of what Nate was dancing around. He looked directly at Nate. "Chuck?" he whispered.

"He says he isn't."

"But?"

"But… I think he's Dansexual."

Dan snorted a laugh. "Are you serious?"

"Dead serious," Nate said, his eyes intense and his expression very serious.

Dan settled and sat back again. "Oh."

"Yeah."

They sat like that for a while.

"Keep it to yourself though, ok, man? It's bad enough what he's going through."

"I completely understand."

"Good."

"Good."

They hung out watching TV for a while and soon the sun started to dusk.

"I should go."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I feel like Chuck is being held hostage just because he doesn't want to see me."

"You're very noble, Dan, but Chuck Bass would go anywhere he wants regardless of who is there and who isn't."

"Point," Dan agreed. "He's probably jerking off or something anyway," he added, initiating a little round of chuckles.

"So," Nate said when they sobered up again. Dan turned to him. "Is Dan Chucksexual in return?"

"Can you stop making up words? We have enough that we don't even know."

Nate kept looking at him.

"I've been with guys before." He licked his lips.

Nate nodded.

"I'm bisexual."

"Ugh…then fucking go fuck him already!" Nate mourned.

"What?" Dan incredulously laughed.

"Figure this out with him, at least. You're both my friends and I don't want one or the other in the same country as the only option for me."

Dan exhaled. "Fine. I'll go talk to him."

Nate brightened up. "Really?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'll talk to him," Dan replied, standing and making his way to Chuck's room.

A second later, Nate said, "Wait."

Dan paused and turned back to him. "Now I know why Chuck says 'what' so much."

"Shut up. I have an idea." Nate got up and led the way to his room. "Wear this."

"I thought you were the non-gay one."

The door to his room opened and Monkey jumped off the bed.

"Leave me alone, Nate," he grunted, half asleep.

"I'm not Nate," the voice replied as the door closed.

Chuck's eyes flew open. They widened further in shock. "What are you doing in here?"

"I need to talk to you." Dan walked in and sat on the bed.

"Well, I don't want to talk to you," Chuck sarcastically returned.

"Too bad."

A second later, Chuck randomly said, "is that what you were wearing before?"

"Yeah. Nate poured… dropped… something and I had to change."

"If he dropped it, shouldn't he be the one changing."

"It fell on me. From him. To me. That's not the point of me coming here."

Chuck stared at the ceiling, trying to ignore it all.

"I actually came in to tell you one thing, Chuck Bass."

Chuck turned towards him. "Oh yeah? What's that?"

Dan smirked and straddled the surprised Chuck holding his thighs down with his shins and feet, and his hands up over his head with his own. "Game over."

"Get. Off me."

Dan was obviously good at keeping his balance as he resisted Chuck's fight to move. Dan's smirk remained as he plunged down and took Chuck's lips.

Chuck lost the fight… and soon, he was kissing back. As soon as his hands were free, they flew to Dan's hips and pulled him down. Dan fell forward, straightening his legs one between Chuck's legs and one to the side. When he paused and pulled his lips away, smirk returning. "See how much better it is to feel?"

Intensity left and fear returned to Chuck's eyes. He was able to push Dan aside and jump off the bed quickly. "Stay away from me!" he cried, pointing at Dan with the expression of a dear caught in headlights. "Don't come near me!"

Dan remained where he was, on his side, looking back at Chuck. Many seconds passed in silence.

"What do you want, Chuck?" Dan said.

Breathing hard, Chuck realized he had no response.

"Charles?"

The tingle was obvious to anyone who was able to see Chuck at that moment. The corner of Dan's mouth started to lift into a smirk again.

"You like that, don't you?"

"Just leave, Humphrey."

Dan took a deep breath and got up. As he approached, Chuck opened the door and waited for him to leave. Chuck was starting to feel relieved… but Dan didn't leave. No… Dan did not leave.

Chuck gasped and slightly groaned as his back hit the wall he was pinned to in no time. Dan kicked the door shut with his heel.

"Don't fight me."

Chuck eventually stopped trying to turn his face away.

"Feel."

Chuck's eyes widened in a flashback from his dream and the next thing he knew his lips almost felt bruised by the intense lips claiming them. Their lips tore away from each other when Chuck threw his head up, inhaling sharply, when Dan pushed a leg between his own and grinded against him, moving down to the sensitive areas on his neck. Something warm flushed all over Chuck and he found himself clinging to Dan's hair and the back of his shirt when Dan's hands dropped to his nape and hip. Confused, Chuck only concentrated on that warm feeling tingling all over him. Somehow his shirt buttons were undone and Dan's hands were running up and down his chest. He felt his face especially warm when he realized that his body was reacting to what Dan was doing to him. Dan was the last person on Chuck's list of people who might be passionate during 'body language communications'.

Chuck also did not comprehend how he ended up losing his balance and falling back on the bed. He stayed where he was, looking up in awe at the light coming through the windowed wall from behind Dan and glimmering brilliance otherwise around him… or maybe he wasn't awake right now. Dan undid the buttons on the shirt, looking intently at Chuck then dropped it on the floor and climbed over Chuck.

The first thing he noticed when opened his eyes to the sun distortedly coming into the room through the windowed wall was that he was very comfortable.

"Am I dead?"

A chuckle came from underneath him. He tried to get up but the arm around him kept him still and the other's hand came to his chest and cheek. "No. Welcome to the world of the feeling."

"I think, at some point, the Earth moved."

Chuck felt another chuckle.

He tried to look over his shoulder and up. "I'm serious, dude. For real!"

"Maybe. That was your requirement, wasn't it?" Dan rumbled in his ear.

_He was lying back against someone who obviously knew a lot about pressure points on the head. He didn't bother at all as his hair was randomly ruffled and pet back down. It was so serene and dreamy yet surreal. _

"_Feel."_

Chuck inhaled sharply as Dan's voice rumbled in his ear, not moving from the embrace. "Feel."

He was still trying to grasp the feeling of not having to break walls to get something… anything. Feeling at all. Showing it at all. And then he allowed his head to be tipped up sideways and let himself be kissed.


End file.
